~ the evolution of dreams ~
March 31, 2005,1:19 p.m.
biding my time
i am listening to ella fitzgerald and charlie parker play (and sing) "under the moon". sigh. heaven.
tonight is the show for synergy. eeek. i hope it goes well. i realized i am going to be very sad when this is over - i love performing so much. i am determined to perform 150% and to stretch my capabilities as far as they will go...at this point, i can only lead the girls when they are backstage; once we hit the stage if they decide to not give their fullest, or try their hardest, i can't do anything about it. i can only ensure that i perform to my own fullest (which i hope is ever growing!)
i am so happy dancing! this is something completely unexpected. somehow i always thought i would continue academically, and push myself to do a phd and teach...but i can't, now, i realize that, and i have to dance as much as i can while i can, as well as figure out how to pay the grocery bills. (and rent). we will see how it goes. i have lost a lot, by doing university these four years instead of honing my dance skills and increasing my training and dance experience.
everything outside is caught between cold and warm - you can feel warmth in the air, but it is chilly, and it is wet and rainy and grey. it is a good thinking day. a good peace day. the kind of day where as night ventures forth, ghosts walk.
this place is starting (just now) to feel like a home. the walls are familiar; the feel of the place is beginning to settle in. it is odd, how it has taken longer for this apartment to feel as if it's my own - and now, it is starting to, only four weeks before i move again. perhaps subconsciously it is because of the upcoming move that this place is becoming more and more like a certain home. imminent change throws things into interesting perspectives.
~ sappho dancing and skipping to a tune only she can hear
tonight is the show for synergy. eeek. i hope it goes well. i realized i am going to be very sad when this is over - i love performing so much. i am determined to perform 150% and to stretch my capabilities as far as they will go...at this point, i can only lead the girls when they are backstage; once we hit the stage if they decide to not give their fullest, or try their hardest, i can't do anything about it. i can only ensure that i perform to my own fullest (which i hope is ever growing!)
i am so happy dancing! this is something completely unexpected. somehow i always thought i would continue academically, and push myself to do a phd and teach...but i can't, now, i realize that, and i have to dance as much as i can while i can, as well as figure out how to pay the grocery bills. (and rent). we will see how it goes. i have lost a lot, by doing university these four years instead of honing my dance skills and increasing my training and dance experience.
everything outside is caught between cold and warm - you can feel warmth in the air, but it is chilly, and it is wet and rainy and grey. it is a good thinking day. a good peace day. the kind of day where as night ventures forth, ghosts walk.
this place is starting (just now) to feel like a home. the walls are familiar; the feel of the place is beginning to settle in. it is odd, how it has taken longer for this apartment to feel as if it's my own - and now, it is starting to, only four weeks before i move again. perhaps subconsciously it is because of the upcoming move that this place is becoming more and more like a certain home. imminent change throws things into interesting perspectives.
~ sappho dancing and skipping to a tune only she can hear
Labels: transitions
March 27, 2005,2:35 p.m.
tra la
when i was a young lass of twenty or so,
give or take a few years,
i jumped a few logs to avoid some frogs
and landed quite without tears.
these frogs are the nasty
crumbling sort, who lecture
at all who pass by;
but me, oh my, i passed them by,
much to my vicious delight.
and here i am with four weeks left
and a bundle of paper to show,
before i hit the world with a thud
and happily scream all that i know.
goodbye dear frogs, you horrid things,
i just managed to escape your ranks;
i shall go through life in a happy jig
and to you froggies i give no thanks.
tra la.
give or take a few years,
i jumped a few logs to avoid some frogs
and landed quite without tears.
these frogs are the nasty
crumbling sort, who lecture
at all who pass by;
but me, oh my, i passed them by,
much to my vicious delight.
and here i am with four weeks left
and a bundle of paper to show,
before i hit the world with a thud
and happily scream all that i know.
goodbye dear frogs, you horrid things,
i just managed to escape your ranks;
i shall go through life in a happy jig
and to you froggies i give no thanks.
tra la.
Labels: leaving uni
March 10, 2005,9:31 a.m.
bonjour. it's been a while
i've been a super-busy bee lately. there is, this month (march), way too much going on in my life. i think i am stressed (and am suppressing the stress) so that i feel relaxed during the day, which results in my being unable to sleep at night. when i do doze off, i end up having dreams about disgustingly mundane things - the dreams are actually nightmares about everything going wrong with the shows we're scheduled to put on this month (very unhelpful dreams) - and as a result i wake up in a tizzy. and then can't fall back asleep (either because i'm SUPPOSED to be awake or i just can't get back to sleepdom).
school is a mess - at this point i'm just trying to get through things, and finish up a damned essay that has been dragging on for weeks. the choreography for our shows is going well, though, everything taken into consideration - we have a lot of last-minute duets and quartets to figure out but those are easy, in the sense that the dancers in those numbers are well-trained and their bodies will memorize the movements readily. the group numbers are done. (thank GOD.)
if you want to come see us dance, come to the festival of dance at hart house theatre on march 31st - that is the night our group is featured. email me if you want tickets, or buy them at hart house theatre's box office!!!
school is a mess - at this point i'm just trying to get through things, and finish up a damned essay that has been dragging on for weeks. the choreography for our shows is going well, though, everything taken into consideration - we have a lot of last-minute duets and quartets to figure out but those are easy, in the sense that the dancers in those numbers are well-trained and their bodies will memorize the movements readily. the group numbers are done. (thank GOD.)
if you want to come see us dance, come to the festival of dance at hart house theatre on march 31st - that is the night our group is featured. email me if you want tickets, or buy them at hart house theatre's box office!!!
Labels: recalcitrant posting